1. |
Strengths Perspective
03:05
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Fighting back your tears and lying through your teeth,
I know the pain you feel when you breathe.
I know the weight you carry on your shoulders,
Do you feel your breathing getting harder?
Its like your chest filled with water and your body is on fire,
Even though you’re broken inside, still trying to smile.
You don’t have to lie,
You can be broken around me,
You don’t have to hide,
The brokenness is not what I see.
Strength that keeps pushing forward despite all of the pain,
The strength that faces each new day,
Resilience…
To always find a way.
Your fight is a thing of beauty,
Your light is the brightest I have seen,
You can be broken around me,
The brokenness is not what I see.
Where do you go when you close your eyes?
A hell or paradise?
Any signs of hope or reviving what has died?
Where do you go when you close your eyes?
A hell or paradise?
All it takes is a glimmer of hope,
To finally revive what has died.
Strength that keeps pushing forward despite all of the pain,
The strength that faces each new day,
Resilience…
To always find...resilience...to always find resilience.
Strength finds a way,
Just when you thought you had nothing left,
Strength always finds a way,
Take a moment, take a breath,
Strength finds a way,
Strength finds a way,
Just when you thought you had nothing left,
Strength finds a way,
Take a moment...take a breath,
Strength always finds a way,
You still have so much more to give,
Strength finds away,
Just when you thought you had nothing left.
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2. |
Walking Blind
03:17
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How can I dream when I can’t even sleep?
Open up my eyes,
How can I be saved if I never believed?
Open up my eyes.
Running blind,
Running on borrowed time,
Lived the only way I know,
Sins of my past seem so trivial.
I traded in her lips,
For the needles kiss,
If I knew then what I know now,
I might have been able to dig myself out.
I needed help,
Reaching out, grabbing at fistfuls of nothing,
All of my failed attempts,
Due to a lack of sincerity.
And in the moments of clarity,
Is when I can truly see the distance covered,
(“Heroin track marks are clear indicators of drug use.” - The Recovery Village Drug and Alcohol rehab)
The tracks left behind,
Staggered, humbled by life,
I was walking blind.
I said what I needed to,
To be left alone,
Never believing I would get better,
But something is different now,
I’m ready to surrender.
How can I dream when I can’t even sleep?
Open up my eyes,
How can I be saved if I never believed?
Open up my eyes.
And for the first time,
I see the beauty in my life,
Hope took the place of deep despair,
Embracing dreams I never dared.
Finally rescued from myself,
Praises leave a cursed mouth,
Understanding what was missed before,
The freedom in total surrender.
I needed help,
Reaching out, grabbing at fistfuls of nothing,
All of my failed attempts,
Due to a lack of sincerity.
I needed help,
Reaching out, once again fistfuls of nothing,
All of my failed attempts,
Due to a lack of sincerity.
Reaching out, grabbing at fistfuls of nothing.
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3. |
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“I’m gonna leave...this time I mean it”,
Sounds so sweet inside her head,
But when they are standing face to face,
The courage fades.
“One day I’ll find the strength,
To take what's left of me and finally leave this place”.
You’re wrong…
The fact that you’re still standing makes you strong,
Your worth is not measured by someone,
“I’m taking back my life”
...She cries...as she prys...his fingers off her neck,
Then she does something he didn’t expect.
“Everything I need to succeed...I have in me.”
She rose to her feet,
She rose...she rose...
In disbelief, he always thought “you can never leave”,
She rose to her feet,
”Watch me...watch me leave”.
All she had was on her back,
No plans, no map,
“Everything I need to succeed,
I have in me”.
“I found the strength to leave this place.
I found the strength to leave.”
You’re wrong…
The fact you’re still standing makes you strong,
Your worth is not measured by someone,
“I’m taking back my life”.
She rose to her feet.
She rose…
Your life is not measured by someone,
To her feet, she rose.
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4. |
Stages
03:56
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(Denial, Anger, Depression)
Life is hard,
The war inside my head, now this,
Nothing could prepare me,
For the pain and helplessness.
(Denial, Anger, Depression)
I’ve never been so lost in my life,
Bitter goodbyes.
(Bargaining, Anger, Depression)
“If I could take your place I would,
I’d end the pain, the suffering,
Stand right where you stood,
And say the words that changed everything”
(Anger, Depression)
It never got easier,
Everyday I struggle.
(Bargaining, Anger, Depression)
The guilt of wishing that I could have done more,
Made it impossible to look myself in the mirror.
(Anger, Depression)
I’ve never felt so lost,
I’ve never felt so alone in this world,
You held me together.
(Anger, Acceptance)
It’s disrespectful to live in constant sorrow,
So disrespectful to live in constant sorrow.
(Acceptance)
You said let you go...now I finally know why.
(Bargaining, Anger, Depression)
“If I could take your place I would,
I’d end the pain, the suffering,
Stand right where you stood,
And say the words that changed everything”
(Anger, Depression)
It never got easier,
Every day I struggle.
(Acceptance)
We can’t change what happened,
I won’t take one single day for granted,
I honor you by living a life that’s meaningful.
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5. |
The Weight
03:40
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“How is this happening?”
“None of this makes sense.”
“I wasn’t ready.”
I’m trying to find the words,
As if they could bring comfort.
Screaming in your hands,
And asking hard questions
No one could ever answer.
His love remained strong for you, this much I know is true,
You’re wrong if you think leaving is an easy thing to do.
Maybe when you’re older you’ll finally understand...
His sickness. Why he left. Was never part of the plan.
Tough decisions made in the blink of an eye,
Maybe that’s why they leave without saying goodbye.
You were worth staying for,
Proof in the way he fought this war,
It just became too much,
It wasn’t just quitting or just giving up.
Who can really know the weight...
Of leaving when you want to stay?
Who can truly know the weight...
“You don’t understand this weight. I can’t stay”.
Who can really know the weight,
Of leaving when you just can’t stay?
Of leaving when you just can’t stay?
Now you get to tell their story,
So, will you tell their story?
...Not like this,
This wasn’t how it was supposed to be,
But now you get to tell their story.
Tough decisions made in the blink of an eye,
Maybe that’s why they leave without saying goodbye.
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6. |
Regret
03:22
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I can’t see the shore,
But I can feel you through the storm,
Symphony of crashing waves,
I watch my world fade away.
It was just one more step,
I followed you this far,
And I can’t see a thing,
But I know where you are.
Walking on water,
They were walking on water,
Too scared to take that first step,
Now I just walk with regret.
I’ve been witness to miracles,
Seen things that can’t be explained,
I have worked so hard,
For the things in my life,
I can’t just throw them away?
Now I would give it up,
For just one more chance,
I would give it up,
For one more chance.
I want to walk on water,
And feel the waves beneath my feet,
Too scared to take that first step,
Now I walk with regret,
I want to walk on water,
Now I just walk with regret.
It was just one more step,
I followed you this far,
I can see everything,
I know where you are.
Walking on water,
They were walking on water,
Too scared to take that first step,
Now I just walk with regret,
Thought I had all I wanted,
Now I just walk with regret.
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7. |
Unapologetic
03:51
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I used to feel so guilty,
For how I felt,
Or how I viewed the world around me,
I didn’t know how to control my emotions,
Or that for years I was battling depression.
Let me take this time,
To apologize to no one.
I apologize for nothing,
All the tragic things about me,
Just pages to my story,
Failure and overcoming.
How was I supposed to know
All the things that I was feeling,
Were totally normal but so much help was needed,
To calm the hell in my head,
I carried so much regret,
From all the things that I said.
I am not my illness,
I am not my past mistakes.
I am sick and I’ve made many mistakes,
Apologized and I’m in a better place,
Let me take this time to apologize to no one.
I am not my illness or my past mistakes,
I am not my illness, I am not my past mistakes.
To no one...I apologize for nothing,
All the tragic things about me,
Just pages to my story,
Failure, after failure, and after failure...I am overcoming.
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