happysad

by Meg & Dia

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1.
I won’t stop searching till I find it  Lost like memories when I was a kid  Is it in crystals or a sound bath  Or the things I dreamt up but I never did  I’ve looked all over, seeing double  Do I need a single eye   I need a mail order guru like those mail order brides  They say It’s all in meditation  But when I sit still, I’m afraid what I’ll find    Am I gonna get better  Did I drink the Kool-Aid  Am I looking in all the wrong places  Is my body just space    I got that American Spirit   It's searching for what I can’t find  I’m looking in holy rivers  I pray that she’ll show me a sign 
  If I let go of holding tightly  Will I see Jesus in a stranger tonight?  The devil hides in Coca Cola  But if I’m high will I be more qualified?  Cause in my Elvis Presley record I found the light  And my books say I’m a bad ass for just $12.99  Maybe I’ll trace it to my family  But maybe some things, should be buried alive     I’m giving up  I surrender to you  I’m giving up   I surrender to you 
2.
Teenager 03:41
Warm nights  Smoke burns up in our eyes  Lips kiss like this is goodbye  I knew this moment would never stay  Highway  Lines blur into the twilight  I can’t see past the headlights  I still swear that we’ll never change 
  Got your head up in the clouds now  Teenagers  Don’t you ever try to calm down  That flavor  Oh, they figured it out and  Oh, they’re running their mouths and  Oh, we’re needing ‘em now  Teenagers    I still feel like taking a chance  These days are bringing it back  I know that part of me wants escape  Move like my whole bodies on fire  We're not cruel, we're survivors  We feed off of our quiet rage    Burn that midnight oil  We can't stop the flood  Cause it's got a pulse  Burning in our blood 
3.
Koala 03:08
I get so deep in my own head  An endless pit in my own bed  But then you pull me out again  Say Drama Queen this ain’t the end  I fill up with these made up fears  I drown myself in made up tears  You say that this is ending here  I hold you and I disappear    You say, would I lie to you?  Would I lie to you?  You say come here my koala  Let me hold you like I oughta  I say, I’m a wreck  I’m a fucking mess  You say come here my koala  Let me hold you like I oughta    Some nights feel like a heavy load  A ticking clock and I explode  The words get caught up in my throat  You give me space but keep me close  Sometimes the voices get so loud  So loud, like 6 feet underground  I wake up on the battle ground  Scared that I won’t make it out    God, what if no one remembers we’re here  Bones turned to dust as a last souvenir   And I can’t sleep straight through the night 
4.
Lit Match 03:21
Wait till I'm down at the deep end  Wait till I can’t touch the bottom   That's when you tell me that you’re seeing somebody and she feels just like me  I can only take so much  
  I’m bulletproof but I’m human   No, you can’t blame me for that  I can't get over what you did   Swear that it's holding me back   Whenever I sing the music  All the lyrics are so sad   I feel like I’m gonna lose it   But then the pain is a lit match  
  I’m getting used to a sharp end  Loneliness feels like an old friend  I'm just getting cozier with the knife that's stuck in my back   I didn’t think I'd get through it    I’m bulletproof but I’m human   No, you can't blame me for that  And I'll get over what you did   No, it's not holding me back   Whenever I sing the music  All the lyrics are so sad   Now I learned how to use it  Because the pain is a lit match     No, I never thought I’d see the daylight  No, I never thought I’d make the sparks fly  Felt like I was just coming undone  But I feel this new fire like hunger  Pull me out or it be taking me under  Breathe it out or hold it in my lungs
5.
Close my eyes for a minute  Woke up, summer was finished  How’s it gone in an instant  Twisted, distant    I remember those cold hands  And he tasted like stale grass  Lasted long as a quick drag  Oh man, God damn    Red eyes, teeth marks, hushed tones fill up my lungs  Motels, gold stars, dead phones, where can I run  Cause I was better at being young 
  When I first saw the skyline  City lit by the traffic  Made the weekend a classic  Manic, addict 
  Gonna lay down my body cold  Maybe be someone else  Remember what I wanted  When it was still OK to want it 
  Red eyes, crushed bones, mouth guards  Bad dreams, sweet hearts, twin beds 
6.
Warm Blood 03:38
I’ve been stuck in my crazy mind  Thinking, oh my God  Is this all I got  All the voices say  You’re dead either way  Oh my god  Honey, thanks a lot    I got just enough  I got warm blood  I got just enough  I got warm blood  Open my arms to good love  Wish on a star for good luck  I got warm blood  I got the air in my lungs  I swear that I don’t need much   I got warm blood    There’s a light in a lonely room  Saying come inside honey, you’re alright  All my memories, every piece of me  What a sight but they make me smile    I'm not saying I don't get lonely  Somber days that made me crawl  But I got oxygen to flow through me  A heart that beats after it stalls
7.
Boys Can Cry 03:05
Takes the anger out on another   Or is all the screaming just in his head  God, this feeling hurts like a mother  He'll push it down into the pit of his chest  He's got troubles   He don't show it   Till the ocean's   Overflowing   We've got old rules  We don't buy 'em  Now our voices   Can't stay silent  
  Why's it so hard getting it right?  Boys can cry   Girls can fight   Don't get stuck believing the hype  Boys can cry   Girls can fight     Knows what she wants but keeps it quiet   Bites her tongue so she don't scare them away  Rolls up her sleeves only in hiding  Builds her strength because she's hoping for change  Her desire   They won't hear it  She's got fire  Won't go near it      What's gonna change their minds  It'll take some time, won't happen overnight  We're gonna change their minds  Leave it all behind, won't happen overnight 
8.
Distraction 03:16
When you’re calling let it go  You’re just a dead end stop on the road  When I want you, turn around turn around  There’s only one way that this can go  And when I’m only thinking ‘bout my long cold weekend alone  I’m missing every moment  If I can calm my temper  Throw away this pressure I know  I’ll take my shit and own it    Gotta get a little taste of some self love  You’re just a simple distraction  Gotta get a little taste of some self love  You're just a simple distraction    I’ll admit I think of you   And it pulls me down when I do  Time to leave it all behind, I'll be fine  Yeah, it kills you telling the truth  When I’m feeling lonely, pick up when you call me, I know  I’ll hate me in the morning  I’ll keep on moving, I think that I’m getting close   I like where this is going    I’ve been seeing clear for days  How the times, they change
9.
Happy 03:22
Getting close, got me shaking off the weight on my shoulders  Buried gold, dig it up so we could get some exposure  Gravity, dropping like stars in front of me  Solid ground, that’s what you are  You feeling me 
  Now that I’m happy  I can feel it like a flood  Standing on concrete  Cash in when the sun comes up  Floating on my feet  I taste the sugar on my tongue  Now that I’m happy  I’m ready to love someone 
  Changing moods, like my bodies waking up from a fever  Cause of you, turned this sober cynic into a dreamer  Coming out of left field honey   God, I got lucky  More than you could ever know  I’m diving in the cold, cold water  Fall on the altar  Learned how to let it go
10.
Dear Heart 03:37
Dear heart Are you ever coming back to me Did you ever notice how I need you now to experience the things I see Dear Heart I know you're hiding out somewhere I'm feeling numb without someone  to tell me that I'm still enough Show me which way to go Tell me it gets easier I'm scared I'll lose control can we go back to the way we were Dear Heart Hey Friend I know you're feeling incomplete I wish I knew just what you need cause when you're hurting I can feel how deep Hey friend I promise I won't fix you up You're beautiful with all your scars and cuts and I hope that someday someone sees how much Don't give up on me I'm still pulling myself together I need time to breathe Don't give up on me Dear Heart All the years have made you bittersweet And you're not as quick to trust what looks like love cause the last time they left both of us

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released July 26, 2019

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Pure Noise Records Pasadena, California

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